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Andy Dick grabbed some dude’s nutsack.

In: News

Posted By: Doc Holliday at 2:04 pm

26 Jan 2010


(old photo I think)

HUNTINGTON, W.Va. (AP) — Actor and comedian Andy Dick has been charged with two felony counts of sexual abuse in West Virginia.  Dick was arraigned Saturday afternoon in Cabell County Magistrate Court. Court documents say Dick is accused of grabbing a bouncer’s crotch earlier in the morning at the Rum Runners bar in Huntington. Magistrate Patty Verbage Spence set bail at $60,000. Spence set a Feb. 2 preliminary hearing date for the 44-year-old Dick, who was in Huntington to perform at the Funny Bone Comedy Club. Funny Bone managing partner Tom Schaefer says Dick is “absolutely still on the schedule for Saturday and Sunday” and says he planned to post Dick’s bail. A telephone message left at the office of Dick’s manager, Michael Green, was not immediately returned Saturday.

What’s the world coming to when you can’t give a guy a playful little balltap anymore?  That’s just how Andy shakes hands.  Throws you the ol’ “heyhowyadoin.”  And now poor Andy’s got to deal with this in court, just because the bouncer didn’t appreciate a guy giving him a clutch and run.  It’s lewd, lascivious, salacious, outrageous.  The bouncer must’ve been some kind of homophobe, that’s all I can think of.

On a side note, Andy should just plea out to some jail time.  He’d love it there.

“Did you see Shawshank Redemption? I really liked that movie cuz of all the butt-fucking and the maaagic.”

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