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“What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!!!”

In: Movies|News

Posted By: Doc Holliday at 8:52 am

24 Aug 2009

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MADISON, Wis. – True to his word, a hermit who encased his dead mother in a block of ice keeps himself in solitary confinement by threatening people, swearing at guards or simply refusing to leave his cell.

Philip Schuth told a newspaper when he was sentenced to prison in 2005 that he feared other inmates and wanted to live in solitary confinement. Prison conduct reports show Schuth, 56, has been working to do that, earning more than 1,400 days in solitary.  His prolonged stint in solitary can be attributed to several factors.  He constantly disobeys orders to leave solitary or to return to his cell, he threatens to hurt guards or others with knives, and he called a Green Bay guard a “Nazi flattop (expletive)” in April 2007.

For decades Schuth and his mother, Edith, lived in a crumbling two-story house in the town of Campbell, a hamlet of about 4,000 people on French Island outside La Crosse, Wis.  In April 2005, Schuth shot Randy Russell Jr. after Russell came into his yard to ask if Schuth had hit Russell’s 10-year-old son. Russell fled and Schuth retreated into his house. An all-night standoff with police ensued. Schuth eventually surrendered without incident and Russell survived his wounds.

Police then discovered Schuth’s dead mother in a basement chest freezer, frozen into a 200-to-300 pound block of ice. Schuth told investigators she died in 2000 of natural causes. He kept her hidden because he feared police might charge him with homicide and he needed her Social Security payments.  Sentenced to 7 years in prison, The next summer a federal judge gave him another four months, to be served simultaneously with his state sentence, for Social Security fraud. Schuth gave a bizarre speech in court laced with Latin, demanding more roles for actress Jennifer Garner and fewer for her husband, Ben Affleck.

Hey there.  You’re probably wondering which direction we’re gonna go with this.  Are we gonna make a Jennifer Garner joke?  Are we gonna make a Ben Affleck joke?  Or maybe we’ll just use any excuse to leave you with the most ridiculous 9 minutes and 51 seconds on the internet:

Yeah, that’s good.  That’s good.

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