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Drink of the Week: Jungle Juice

In: Drink of the Week

Posted By: Doc Holliday at 10:06 am

14 Aug 2009


Countryfest is finally upon us, my friends.  We’ve had to wait longer than usual this summer, but our patience will be rewarded with one hell of a weather forecast tomorrow.  85 degrees, 0% chance of precipitation, and not a cloud in the sky.  Bring the SPF.  I get especially pumped up for this event, mainly because there are only so many opportunities a year where it becomes socially acceptable again for a post-graduate to partake in heavy day drinking – and tomorrow is such an opportunity.  There’s definitely a marked distinction between the level you shoot for on a Saturday beach day drinking casuals versus a day-long tailgate surrounded by thousands of like-minded Kenny fans.  In this corner of the country, St. Paddy’s Day, the 4th of July, and college homecoming round out the top of a short list of day-drinking mainstays.  I tend to put Thanksgiving Wednesday, Good Friday, New Year’s Eve, Labor Day, Memorial Day, your birthday, and family holidays all in a different category either because the drinking starts at night, it’s too cold to drink outside, or you’re not always aiming to get smushed.  The Super Bowl could swing either way depending on your pre-game rituals (as could Memorial and Labor Day).  But of course this is just my humble opinion.  Feel free to discuss the subject further in the comments section – I’m actually kind of curious to hear what people think.

Back to Countryfest.  Beer is always Option A in a tailgate situation, but I thought I’d suggest something a little more creative as well just in case you feel like mixing things up.  So here’s my go-to recipe for jungle juice.  It’s simple, cheap, delicious, and strong as shit.  Just bring a cooler and the ingredients and you can do all the mixing upon arrival in the lot.  Share your own recipes in the comments section, because I know some of you like to get complex with your juice recipes.

1 handle of cheap vodka
1 30 rack of cheap beer
1 & 1/2 containers of 
Countrytime lemonade powder 

- Crack open and pour in all 30 beers, minimize foam.
- Pour in entire handle of vodka.
- Start adding powder and stir with empty handle.  Add, stir, add, stir, etc.

Important notes:
- Once you get past 1 & 1/4 countrytime bottles, start doing taste tests to see what sweetness level you’re at.  I don’t like mine too sweet, and I hit my preferred level somewhere around 1 & 1/2 bottles.
- Use either pink lemonade or strawberry lemonade.  The strawberry lemonade flavor’s probably my favorite.
- Make sure you use cheap beer and vodka.  This is a must.  I’ve tried more expensive options and it never comes out as good for some reason.  Keystone and Popov.  Trust me.
- If you want to make a larger quantity, then do your own math to figure out the proportions, pay special attention to how much powder you’re adding.

That’s it.  Pretty easy, right?  I know the ingredients sound disgusting, but they magically combine to make one hell of a tasty juice.  It’s another one of nature’s little mysteries that man will never understand.  Just like a woman’s brain.

So do yourself a favor tomorrow and stir up some jungle juice.  The girls will flock to your tent.  If you’re double-fisting beer and jungle juice, then you should be hitting your stride after a couple hours.  Plus, everybody loves a double-fister, even your mom.  Enjoy the show.

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