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Nothing Boosts TV Ratings Like Hired Killings

In: News

Posted By: The Booze at 2:39 pm

12 Aug 2009

SAO PAULO, Brazil — In one murder after another, the Canal Livre TV show had an uncanny knack for being first on the scene, gathering graphic footage of the victim.

Too uncanny, say police, who are investigating the show’s host, state legislator Wallace Souza, on suspicion of commissioning at least five of the murders to boost his ratings and prove his claim that Brazil’s Amazon region is awash in violent crime.

“The order to execute always came from the legislator and his son, who then alerted the TV crews to get to the scene before the police,” state police intelligence chief Thomaz Vasconcelos charged in an interview with The Associated Press.

The killings, he said, “appear to have been committed to get rid of his rivals and increase the audience of the TV show.” I have been looking for a way to boost ratings for BoozeWorthy. I guess the equivalent move for us would be to stage videos of people getting kicked in the nuts and have first-hand altercations with trannies. That’d make for some good survival tips and tranny news segments.

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